The Roles of the Administrator, Teacher, Security, and Support Staff
Todd Farr, Terry Kent, Jeremy Radke, Candy Rodio

HOW TO DEAL WITH OPPOSITIONAL PARENTS
Roles of the: Administrator, Teacher, Security, and Support Staff

Communication Suggestions
Begin each interaction with an open mind, smile and shake hands. Ask oneself, "how can I win this parent over?" Let the parent talk until they have said everything they intended to say. Listen with empathy, recognizing the context, and don't make assumptions. Most people have valid concerns; seek to understand them. When speaking, remain calm and use a soothing voice. Focus on all sides of the issue(s) and how they impact the operation of the school. Most people are satisfied if they are given the opportunity to voice their concern, be heard, and considered in the decision-making process. Be respectful at all times and spend as much time as necessary to resolve the issue. Never back anyone into a corner when making decisions; always provide outs that relieve tension or save face. End each interaction with a smile and hand shake with the intent to resolve the issue in an equitable and consistent manner.

Teacher/staff complaints should be handled carefully. Most circumstances are worthy of the administrator's support and require investigation of the allegations. If necessary, meet with both the student and teacher/staff person(s) to resolve the problem before a parent meeting becomes necessary.

If the problem involves special education students, consider the individual student's education plan (IEP).

Educating parents on the operation of the school can assist them in solving their own problems. This provides an avenue for parents to connect with the appropriate staff and ways to approach solutions. If a parent is still dissatisfied, they can take the issue to the district office for a "fair-hearing" and mediation.

Professional Development
Staff must be provided the appropriate tools for their success. This may include learning opportunities that help them develop and understand the human relations culture of the school, processes, and professionalism. Telephone contact must be anticipated and staff must understand the process for helping direct parents and community members to the appropriate person(s). One must always consider that employees learn from the actions of those in leadership positions.

The Teacher's Role
Many teachers dread dealing with oppositional parents. Teachers have enough to deal with already, and then a parent comes down the hall with a disgruntled look on his/her face. What can be done? Here is what one secondary special education teacher said, "when I have difficult parents I try to solve the problem without an Individual Education Plan (IEP) if possible . . . I meet with the parent, brainstorm solutions, contact the student's teachers, and help with problems on campus. I try to educate the parents as to how the school "runs" . . . connect them with the offices and staff and help them become able to solve problems on their own. If necessary, we schedule an IEP, and the parent has that right . . . then we have to follow the timelines . . . I find if I establish a good rapport with parents many problems can be solved before using an IEP . . . If a parent is still unhappy with services after the site has tried to do their best we might schedule an "expanded" IEP with representatives from the district. If the parent is still dissatisfied, they can take the district to "fair-hearing" and mediation . . . there are timelines for all of these processes." One elementary teacher said, "when I see a parent coming toward me with a disgruntled look, I am "running" possibilities for opposition in my mind. In other words, I am trying to pinpoint why he/she would have a need to be oppositional. I greet the parent with a smile in any case and make "small talk." Usually, he/she will let me know if they are dissatisfied and why. While maintaining eye contact and after thoroughly listening to the parent, I repeat back to him/her what was said. Then I take notes as to the best remedy for resolving the problem." Both of these teacher's responses provide avenues for dealing with oppositional parents.

Keppel Union School District has established a proactive stance in preparing staff for dealing with oppositional groups. The six step plan involves: (1) identifying the issue, (2) sharing interests, (3) developing options, (4) using objective criteria/standards to select options, (5) gaining commitment to proposed solution/resolution, and (6) evaluating outcomes. This model provides consistency among staff and breeds understanding between those involved. The following table is based on a program developed by the United States Department of Labor and shows each step and the process for understanding and defusing opposition. ---

The final stage is evaluation, which provides the opportunity to fine tune the process and improves the model to meet the individual school needs for reaching equitable satisfaction.

Security's Role
In 1998 state law was enacted that requires security guards in K-12 school districts to complete a course of training developed by the Bureau of Security and Investigative Services (BSIS). This affects all supervision personnel working on school property for more than 20 hours per week. In an elementary school this would most likely be yard duty supervisors, campus monitors or crossing guards. Actual "School Security Officers" are hired at most middle and junior high schools. Secondary or high schools have an even more intensive force of such officers (including state peace officers). The scope of this project refers to such persons employed by a campus to perform security functions that do not have the authority to act as a peace officer (school security personnel officers are bound by California Business and Professions Code Section 7583.45 and California State Education Code Sections 38001.5 and 72330.5).

The role of campus security in dealing with a confrontational parent is two-fold, safety and diffusion of the situation. Security staff undergo varied amounts of training (depending on the site and length of service) to keep the lines of communication open whereas the parent can truly feel that their issue is being responded to in a positive manner. The initial approach is to get the parent into a "comfortable" situation where security personnel are not addressing the parents in the eyes or ears of students or others on campus. Angry parents are often directed to come along to a more suitable location (generally the administrator's office) or a convenient location to the incident.

In a security officer's eyes it is a crime to come onto campus without permission or create a disturbance while on the campus. Hostile parents may be asked to leave with a threat of trespassing if they are unwilling to comply with school rules in resolving issues. According to interviews of security personnel, this does not happen frequently. Usually the parent is more interested in being heard, and they will generally follow (even though sometimes still loudly voicing comment) security personnel's direction's. Security's concern is not generally handling complaints, but maintaining a safe environment. They are in-serviced to speak to the confrontational parent with professionalism while maintaining a positive focus on the specific issue(s).

Teachers, support staff, and administrators all rely heavily on the efficient handling of unexpected confrontational parents by security. While administrators have to handle the parent complaint, a highly educated security person can play a vital role in defusing confrontational parents. Campus security prides itself on their alert approach to those entering the campus.

A major challenge facing a security officer is the issue of custodial parents. Often a non-custodial parent will go on campus without the staff's knowledge. It is usually the student that will "spill the beans" and alert someone at the school. It is the job of campus security to confront such a parent and ensure the child's safety. There may be restraining orders and the issue becomes a legal battle for the school. Custodial parents may often fully expect the school to be responsible for court knowledge that often is not disseminated to everyone on campus.

Most campus supervisors and security staff work alongside each other in dealing with confrontational parents on campus. Radio systems are the norm at most campuses whereby other help can be alerted. Often, security will tell you it is quite useful to call several people when approaching a suspected angry parent. When they are in a crowd of several different "witnesses" they are more apt to comply with a request to take it to the right place. Teachers often can alert security about a possible confrontation. Security personnel can conveniently check-in to ensure that things have not escalated to a confrontational level without the support of security or administrative help for the teacher or support staff on campus.

Security personnel are the peacekeeping force on a campus and generally, most confrontational parents will support that. If they don't, it can easily become a legal issue for the parent (totally aside from whatever matter the parent has to present to the school).

The Role of Support Staff
Support staff may include any of the following positions: secretaries, attendance and office clerks, food service personnel, playground supervisors, general education instructional assistants, special education aides, custodial personnel, and grounds keepers.

Front office secretaries are often the first to confront oppositional parents.

Instructional assistants and special education aides are another group that may come in contact with oppositional parents. Rumors, inaccurate and confidential conversations can provide additional agitation to an already oppositional parent. Hence most districts spend considerable time stressing the importance of confidentiality with instructional assistants and special education aides.

Communication to the office is the way that support staff alert the principal with a problem student, teacher or parent. School grievance procedures should be in place to handle complaints. It is imperative that support staff know the communication procedures for handling problems. Open lines of communication with teachers are important for playground supervisors.